My Only Way Out

(is to go so far in)

Focus on the positive

Posted by Cauri on April 20, 2006

It's been sort of a rough week, and…This one woman at work has been really getting on my nerves lately…To the point where i was really dreading working with her.  There was one day where she was saying bad things about one of my best friends who works there, and it really had an effect on me.  I wasn't totally aware of it, but i just didn't even want to be near her anymore.  Today, she finally called me on it.  She wanted to know what was wrong with me.  I tried to pretend nothing was bothering me, but then she finally brought up the amount of negativity in our store lately.  I told her that that's what's really bothering me…the constant backstabbing and jealousy…that it's really been rattling me.  She said it's really been bothering her lately too, that sometimes she feels sick to her stomach before work, that she doesn't even want to come through the door.  And i felt partially guilty.  That just because i heard her backstabbing one of my friends, that maybe i should've just let it go in one ear and out the other.  How am I improving the situation by being cold to her?  She even said, we need to start focusing on the positive.  And she was right.  And after that conversation, I can't tell you how much better I feel.  How I'll be able to walk into work with this positive attitude.  And it really does make a difference.  Even if people around you are negative, you shouldn't let it affect you.  Obviously it's easier said than done, but it's something I'm going to try to be more aware of. 

I called my boyfriend on the way home from work (and earlier in the day i'd been kind of snappy at him), and he said he heard such a difference in my voice.  That earlier i was even picking at negative things, i was in such a bad mood.  He said I needed to just concentrate on how much he loves me.  All the time.  Even when i am in a bad mood.  And that seems to be exactly the lesson i needed to learn today.

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One Response to “Focus on the positive”

  1. tracie b said

    i think the next time she talks about your friend, you should tell her that you don’t appreciate it. i’ll bet she’ll never do it again. she sounds pretty reasonable, though–so you’re lucky. at my first “real” job there was an evil, bitter woman. no matter how nice, deferential, or agreeable i was, she bullied the hell out of me. after 2 years (and a dysfunctional diegestive system from the stress) i left and never looked back. although i do have nightmares about her every now and then…

    what is my point? do what you can to smooth things out, but if your life becomes clouded by your situation, change it. it’s not worth your health and private life!

    thanks for visiting my site and i look forward to tagging along on your journey into adulthood 🙂

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