My Only Way Out

(is to go so far in)

Happiness at work…(and More Mom Garbage)

Posted by Cauri on February 16, 2006

I had a pretty amazing day at work today.  Storytime was a success…for the two children who showed up =)  Well, the 3 of us had fun reading stories about trains & eating chocolate cookies. And I’m really getting to be very close with everyone I work with.  There’s one man who’s about my dad’s age who i never really talked with before (besides very general conversations), but today i really opened up to him about my parents & all that garbage, and he was talking to me all about his family life, and it was really nice to reach that deeper level with him…Sometimes i feel so disconnected from people that are older than me, but today we really connected.  And then another woman i work with (who’s about 30 & a widow) came in around 3…and she’s been opening up to me for a couple weeks now, and last week I had a very weird feeling about the “right one” coming into her life, and i kept telling her that he’s coming, and she seemed kind of excited, but still skeptical…And today, she told me a story about a customer a couple days ago who had his eyes on her the whole time he was in the store. She said another customer commented on her “admirer”, and then she started talking to him, and as she got to know him, she said the whole meeting was very strange–It was very intense and something she never experienced before.  As she told me this story today, i literally had goose bumps and tears in my eyes and blurted out “That’s him, That’s who I was talking about, He’s your soulmate!” before i even really thought about what i was saying. The whole thing was very weird, and i’m anxious to find out what happens with them.

In other news, my great grandmother died last weekend…But she was 93, and i think i saw her about 4 times in my life, and my mom was leaving me messages about how I was “expected” to be at the funeral and blahblahblah, but I really saw no need to be there, and so..I wasn’t.  My brother talked to my mom a little yesterday at the viewing though and explained that i’m basically unhappy with her.. and he asked why she won’t just pay child support, but she couldn’t really give a reason. She said she just doesn’t want my dad making a profit off this or something, but…whatever, that’s ridiculous. If she couldn’t afford the cost of living in nj, and she was making twice what my dad makes (AND she has a husband who makes even more than her)…Then how does she expect my dad to afford it when he’s paid for EVERYTHING for me and my brother for the past 10 years?  Not to mention all the little things he has to pay for, like, Rent, car insurance, bills, and um Food?  When she decides to grow up and accept responsibility for things, maybe then I’ll return her calls, and maybe then I’ll consider attending funerals (which my personal religious views don’t even deem necessary), but until then, I don’t think she really has the right to “expect”/demand me to be anywhere.


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